As I grow old, there seem to be less things I can romanticize about. the city, people, coffee and drinks, friends and family, etc. These are all great things we can put a little bit of poetic brush on and make into cinematic snippets. But I can’t really do it anymore, my phone constantly buzzes of my users’ messages and I can’t sleep because I don’t know when and where the next lawsuit will hit.

I lay back and think of all the black and white photos of the great people I read from biographies. And I try to figure out why that’s something that I’d aspire to so much. Loneliness swallows me, and I turn off my brain before I spiral.

I dream of the next big steps, building, getting users, getting investment, moving to sf, scaling, revenues and retiring my parents. It frightens me as much as it makes me excited.

It’s a constant cycle of collapsing and getting back up. Life is exciting because you have something to work on, after all. Passion is a privilege to have. If you can’t have it, make it.